Answers To Four Common Funeral Etiquette Questions

Posted on: 9 June 2015

Visiting a funeral home to express your condolences to the family of someone who has passed away can be difficult enough, but the experience can become even more challenging if you're unsure of the proper funeral or visitation etiquette. Knowing the answers to some commonly asked etiquette questions ensures that the family in grief appreciates your attendance and that you're able to provide support in the appropriate manner. Here's what you should know:

What To Wear

In most cultures, you're no longer expected to choose an all-black outfit before you visit a funeral home. However, dressing on the conservative side and wearing muted colors is a way to show respect. Women and men alike can dress in black, brown, gray or blue outfits to suit the occasion.

Although men don't have to wear dark ties and women don't have to skip the jewelry, it's best to opt for something understated. Finally, for your own comfort, pick a comfortable pair of shoes -- a funeral home visit can often involve plenty of standing.

What To Say

Many people feel anxious when they approach the surviving family members and have to verbally convey their sympathy. This process doesn't have to be as difficult as it might seem. Simple statements such as, "I'm so sorry for your loss" and "Please know that my thoughts are with you," followed by a hug or a handshake, are enough to get the message across. In general, it's best to avoid specifically talking about the person's death.

How Long To Stay

It can feel awkward standing around the funeral home during a viewing after you've expressed your condolences. On one hand, you're ready to leave, but on the other hand, you don't want to appear as though you dashed away insensitively. Generally, you should expect to stay between 15 and 30 minutes. This duration allows you to speak to family members and "be seen," but won't drastically affect your day's schedule.

How To Write In The Guestbook

Many people are unsure of how to approach writing in the funeral's guestbook. A funeral guestbook isn't the place to write your condolences. Rather, it serves as a record of the people who attended for the family to review at a later date when sending notes of thanks. Regardless of how those ahead of you signed the book, simply write your name and, if required, your mailing address. Express your condolences verbally and with an appropriate sympathy card.

To learn more, contact a company like Thomas Funeral Chapels Inc. with any questions you have.

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